How to get ready for the one

You probably read my recent post “What if you find the one”, now I felt like getting more concrete and I want to try to write a little guide on what I think are the best steps to take when you are single and looking/ready for love.

Most of the things you’ll read come from my own experiences, experiences from friends or books that I read. I might add some things later but here are the most important ones:

1. Learn to love yourself. This is probably the hardest one but the biggest mistake most people do is relying on the love they receive from their partner and thinking it’s enough. You have to love yourself first. If you love yourself others will love you too. On the other hand you will never be really loved until you learn to love yourself.

2. Don’t be afraid to be alone. No one likes it and I talked about this before (see also: What if you find the one?) but you have to learn this first. Don’t run from one disturbing relationship to the other. Stop it. Be alone.Appreciate your own company so others will appreciate it too. If you treat yourself right others will do so as well or at least you will realize when it’s time to leave. a

3. Get rid of all the maybes. Everyone knows them, everyone has them. People you date occasionally, people that might be an option at some point, people you could imagine having a relationship with but something is missing etc. GET RID OF THEM! They all block you for a serious relationship because they are on your mind and you are on their mind. Forget them NOW! Make yourself absolutely free and don’t be an option for anybody.

4. Be true to yourself. Deal with your feelings. If you have feelings for someone tell them, find out if they feel the same, if they don’t forget them. Don’t keep on waiting. Do something! Otherwise point 3 might not work out. If you in fact want to get rid of a “maybe” you actually have to tell them that you are not an option for them anymore, that they should not contact you anymore and that you never want to be with them anymore. Here point 2 comes into action again: don’t be afraid of being alone!

5. Say sorry. Maybe you have broken someone’s heart in the past and you still think of them because you’re sorry. If you keep on thinking about them contact them and say sorry, only if it’s appropriate though. Sometimes this little ritual can also free something in yourself, try it out.

Putting all this points together it all comes down to making space for the one who really deserves being with you. If there is no space in your life how will he/she be able to enter?