Good-bye drama!

Do you know these times when life seems to be full of trouble? When you’re not really happy with work, your love life or your friends? When you somehow keep on complaining and nothings seems to turn out in the way you were aiming for?

These introductory questions should just help a bit to describe what I mean by using the word “drama”. It can be a lot but for me it’s mainly making yourself unhappy by creating unhappy thoughts, situations, interactions etc. and especially not stopping with it.

So how to get out of this? I feel that everyone is doing it all the time. Something small that you don’t like happens and then the drama starts, either with yourself or with your friends, your colleagues, with a random person on the street, anyone can do it. The most obvious way to get out would be being absolutely present like I described in the last posting. Well, but this takes some time and practice. What can you do now?

1. Make the decision that you don’t want this anymore It sounds easy but I believe most people choose to have drama in their life because they would be bored otherwise. Or they are just used to it and think it’s normal. Anyway, you have to decide to stop and only then you can take further steps.

2. Get rid of all the toxic people in your life If you’re not sure what toxic people are or what they do go ahead and check this article or just type it in google: http://www.heysigmund.com/toxic-people/ But I don’t mean only them, I also mean people who are just creating drama all the time and keep on involving you. Always discussions, arguments, misunderstandings, … You know what? If someone does not understand you and keeping their friendship takes constant discussions and justifications they are just not made to be your friend or you are not made to be theirs. Accept it and take some distance! Otherwise you will be stuck in drama forever. There are people who understand you even without words. Invest your time and energy in them and leave the rest behind.

3. Become a bit egoistic but leave the ego behind You have to stop putting everyone’s needs always first and yours behind. People who get constantly involved in other people’s drama tend to be like that. I don’t like people who think about themselves all the time either but there are some things that you can learn from them. The second part about the ego is very well described in Eckart Tolle’s book “The Power of Now”. It basically describes the need to be constantly right, be in the center of attention, be the first in doing something etc. It describes how to get rid of this thoughts as they don’t help you at all. So for instance if you take some distance from a person that isn’t good for you and they don’t care either your ego might be disturbed but you have to accept it as it is of no importance.

4. Accept change If you really take the steps I mentioned above a lot will change in your life.And you have to deal with it! Less people will call because when you’re not interested in their drama anymore they won’t be interested in calling you. There will be some empty space to be filled but this is good! You have more time for the people who are really there for you, you have more time for yourself, and you will be in peace. Finally some calmness coming to your life. First you might have trouble dealing with it or realizing it’s something good but believe me once you are there your whole life will transform, you will be transformed!

5. Stop talking about it Of course changing your lifestyle and in particular your friends will keep your thoughts busy and you probably will feel the need to talk about it. It’s okay if you talk about it, it might even help you to digest the whole change. But make sure to stop talking about it as soon as you can. If you keep on talking about it you start creating drama again. It was your decision to make some change in your life, so accept it and let the transformation begin.

I hope this little guide will help you living a better life as this is the intention of the whole blog. Best of luck to all of you!